Smoke
by Bonehead XL
Summary: As Dib and Gaz stumble through adulthood, they find each other struggling with guilt and addiction. Smoke has clouded their view. Will it destroy them for good?


Disclaimer: Invader ZIM is not my property. Jhonen Vasquez and the losers at Nickelodeon own it. All the character are also not owned by me and just happen to also be owned by Jhonen Vasquez and Nickelodeon, which is really a smaller company that is owned by Paramount Studios, so technically, the losers at Paramount Studios own ZIM, but who reading this really gives a shit? Also, this story is not for children as it contains some sex and a lot of talk about drugs. You've been warned.

---

The needle forced its way into Dib's wrist.

It hurt, but it always hurt. Even when you put that wipe-y gel stuff on before hand. Dib never knew what that stuff was anyway.

Blood filled thechamber and Dib pushed down on the plunger.

He felt better.

SMOKE… By Bonehead XL

"Oh… Yeah… That feels great."

"Would like it if I went a little harder?"

"Ah… Wow… You're good at this."

"It's what I do for a living."

He laughed as he placed his hands around the prostitute's waist. She bounced up and down as his moans continued. The two had become almost friends since Dib started asking for her on a monthly bias. She increased her rhythm.

"Oh, I'm almost there…" Dib moaned.

Dib never could last real long when it came to sex. Hewould releashwithin five minutes and that was the end of it. Of course, it wasn't like he ever got sex from any one other than hookers. Sure, it coasted a heavy chunk of change, but it was easier then going to a club and picking up a woman, at least for Dib.

"Oh, yeah… Uh… Uh-huh…"

Dib let out a heavy sigh as he reached his climax. The hooker continued to hump for a few seconds after Dib's orgasm, Dib always told her to, he liked it.

"You all done?" She asked.

"Yeah. Thanks." Dib stated as she got up.

She walked across the room to the mirror, pulling down her skirt along the way. She then put on a new coat of lipstick. The hooker then smiled at Dib after hearing his last statement.

"The only thanks I need is your money." She said.

"Right," Dib retorted as he reached for his wallet. He removed fifty dollars. "Is this enough?"

She grabbed the wad of cash. "That'll do nicely."

Dib looked at the woman. She was rather nice looking. Dib was always a little shocked at how good the girls at the local house looked. He had always had the understanding that hookers were dirty, ugly, people. Most of the hookers there where versatile girls around there twenty. He personally thought this one was beautiful.

"We've slept together four times already and I don't even know your name." Dib realized.

"I thought guys thought it was a turn-on not to know the name of the girl they were screwing." She sharply responded.

"I just want to know what name to shout when I finish." He calmly said.

She giggled. "My name's Heather. Yours?"

"Dib." He countered.

Again, she giggled. "Okay, Dib. So, I guess I'll see you next month?"

"Maybe." Dib liked being cryptic around woman.

"All right then. Bye-bye." She walked out of the room then out of the house.

Dib was by himself again.

---

Dib placed the soiled condom into a small zip-lock bag. He zipped up the bag then threw it into the garbage can. Dib always hated these after sex activities, but he figured it was better safe-then-sorry when it came to hookers. Dib always thought that sex was something that was shared between the souls, and that there shouldn't be anything left over to deal with. He always thought that the sperm should travel and go make more people, and yet here he was, eliminating the evidence of the act. He hated it.

The scars on his wrist itched.

Dib needed a cigarette.

---

There was a ring at the door.

Dib opened the door.

"Hello?" He questioned.

"It's your sister, don't look so damn shocked. I left a message on your machine." Gaz still spoke with a vaguely sarcastic tone to her voice.

"Oh, give me a minute…" Dib closed the door. A moment later Gaz could hear the sounds of objects being moved, draws closing, and clothes stretching. Another moment passed and the door open again. Dib stood there in a bathrobe. "Come on in." He spouted.

Gaz entered the building. She eyed the room. They're where severely rips in the coach, a large burn mark on the floor, and what looked like knife marks in the walls. Dib walked over to small refrigerator in the corner of the room.

"Gee, this place is, uh, kinda'…" Dib finished Gaz's statement for her.

"Shitty?"

"Yeah, that was the word I was looking for. How you get a hold of this place anyway?" She asked as she took a seat on the couch.

"It's all I could afford after Dad died." He spoke as he searched the fridge for something to drink.

"Couldn't you have spent your half of the inherence on something nicer?" She quipped.

"I, uh, spent that on something else," He removed a soda from the fridge and then sat down next to here. "So, what are you doing here again?"

"What, your sister can't come by and say hi?"

"Well, of course you can, but next time just leave me more of a warning."

---

"So, you didn't mess this place up all by yourself did you?" Gaz questioned.

"Naw, it was this messed-up when I bought it. Rumor has it that some sociopath owned it before me."

"Weird."

Dib sipped his soda as an uncomfortable silence grew. He hadn't seen his sister in years, and, for no reason, she just drops by. He wasn't prepared for this. Dib felt like she was here to find something out, to snoop, and if there was a person he didn't want snooping around his things, it was his sister.

"So, have you found a job yet?" Gaz broke the silence.

"No, not yet." Dib sipped his drink.

"What about that substitute teaching job? That sounded promising."

"Yeah, it was, but apparently the high school has very healthy teachers."

"Oh, bad luck."

"It's the only luck I seem to haveof late."

Dib felt the need to go into a long-winded moping troop detailing his sorrow, and his depression, and shit. But Dib wasn't going to do that. There was no point. His sister wouldn't care.

"What about Todd? Is he all right?" Dib decided he would shatter the silence this time.

Gaz's eyes sunk. "Todd left."

Dib wasn't at all shocked. "I'm sorry. Why did he do that?"

Gaz's voice lowered to an almost whisper.

"I'm not sure why he left. He didn't leave a note or anything; he just wasn't there one day. He was so depressed of late, ever since he started going through that childhood regression, hypnoses, thing."

"I'm sorry Gaz. That's awful."

There was so much that Gaz didn't tell Dib, like how Todd walked in on her with her _other _lover. She didn't need to tell Dib that, he could figure it out all by himself. Dib knew his sister that way.

The scars on his wrist inched.

"I have to go get something at the store. Is it okay if you just hang out her for a little?" Dib tried to act as casual as possible.

"That's fine," She smiled weakly as Dib started to walk towards the door. "Um, maybe you should put some cloths on?"

Dib noticed he was still in his bathrobe. "Right, that would be a good idea."

---

The man dropped a small bag full of white powder on his desk.

"Is that all you want?" The lanky man behind the desk asked.

Dib sighed. "I guess this I'll do. I mean, I can't afford much more, and, uh, I really need to shoot up."

Dib reached for the bag, but the lanky man pulled it away before he could grab it. The man dropped it on a small scale in the corner of his desk. The man smacked his lips and made that cute, little, "disappointment" sound.

"Those are nasty little holes on your arm there. You'll have to be careful, Dib, or else you'll look like a big, piece of Swiss cheese soon." The man laid back in his chair and probed his feet up on his desk, leaving the flat side of his boots in Dib's face.

"Why are you doing this?" Dib questioned, his voice beginning to shake.

"Now, Mister Membrane, you are not currently employed, are you?"

"Not currently." Dib tried to relax.

"Now, that," The man's finger pointed to the bag and scale. "Little bag of chalk dust over there is not cheap, and I find it hard to believe that you can afford it and not have a job of any kind. Unless you have a very rich grand mother who fully supports your heroine addiction."

"I can't say I have one of those."

"Are you peddling my stuff behind my back?" The lanky man was no longer relaxed.

Dib became more then a little worried. "No! Now, David, I would never. Do that… I-I-I respect you and your business, I don't…" Dib looked at the stern look on David's face and the little hope Dib had of hiding the truth faded.

"I live a very nice life, Dib, and I only have it because of the profit I get from my product. Now, generally, if someone sells my product, with out my permission, and doesn't share the profit… Well, let's just say I don't take a shine to your greed."

"You don't understand…" Dib was sweating.

"Oh, I understand…" David removed a knife from his desk draw, and Dib began to shake with fear. "I understand that you're too fucking lazy to support your own goddamn addiction. I don't appreciate laziness. Especially when I am involved." David got up from his desk and over to the shaking mess that was Dib. "Do you know what I do to lazy people?" David grabbed Dib's hand and placed the blade to one of his fingers.

Dib broke under the weight and collapse infront of David. Tears started to roll down Dib's face and he started to plea.

"Please, don't… I'll get the money somehow… I-I-I-I will! Y-y-y-you can trust me! I'm a good person…" Dib went to blabbering.

David let go of Dib's hand and placed the knife on his desk. A moment later a small bag landed infront of Dib.

"You make me sick." David's harsh voice rang sharply in Dib's ears. "Take your addiction and get out of my office."

Dib grabbed the bag and started to slowly walk to the door when David spoke again.

"If I ever see your face here again, you'll lose a lot more than just a finger."

Dib shivered and quickly left.

---

A moment later, Dib felt a lot better.

---

"This is good." Gaz noted as she munched on the chicken.

"Thanks. It's not much, really. Just something I picked up at the store." Dib cut himself a piece of out the chicken filet.

"Well, at least you know which microwave meals are worth-while."

"Well, that's gotta' be worth something, right?"

Both of them laughed. After the laughter, another one of those silences that are so common around here formed. The two quietly finished their meals and said nothing. Gaz spoke up, in a soft manner.

"This was nice, seeing you and all."

Dib wasn't quite sure how to response to that.

"It was nice. We should do this more often." Dib decided that summed up the evening quite nicely.

"Yeah…"

Dib took their plates, went over to the kitchen and washed them.

---

Gaz started to get her things together. It was time to go.

"It's a long drive home, I should get going." Gaz muttered as she slipped on her jacket.

"Don't leave yet," Dib rushed down the hall toward the bathroom. "I'll be back in a minute!"

Gaz rested on the coach. This was the first time in a long time that Gaz had really talked with her brother. Since they had gotten out of collage, their relationship had grown weaker and their visits less often. Back then Gaz was never the type to linger on anything, really. Looking back, she was a real bitch. She would just take what she wanted, absorb as much as possible from it and then leave it. She tried to pretend that she didn't hear the other girls calling her a slut. Maybe she didn't care, at the time. It wasn't until after Dad had died that she started to put things in prospective. She tried to hold down a long-term relationship. Todd was one of the nicest men she ever met, no one ever treated her the way Todd had. It was the best relationship she ever been in, but soon, like so many things it seemed, it all went sour. Todd talked her into going to a psychologist together. Todd seemed to really like the idea, but Gaz wasn't sure. She didn't like talking to people about her feelings; it made her feel weak, and Gaz wouldn't allow that. Soon afterwards thing really started to go south, Gaz met her old flame, Torque, from collage. She tried really hard not to do anything; she didn't want to hurt Todd. But she did anyway, because she _was _weak.

Gaz stopped thinking about it. No need to get yourself depressed.

She decided to think about Dib instead. He was an easy target. What was Dib's problem anyway? Hmm…

Long sleeves. He always wore long sleeves.

Nervous. He was unusually nervous of late.

He just left early today with little reason. He was really uneasy when he left but seemed super-calm afterwards.

"Oh, God!" Gaz didn't like the conclusion she had come to. Wide-eyed, she decided to check up on something. The curio cabinet. Dib was never very good at hiding things. They where always in the most obvious places.

Gaz rushed over to the cabinet and opened it slowly, afraid of what she may find…

She hated when she was right.

---

Dib washed his hands and started down the hall. He really didn't want his sister to leave. They where having such a nice evening. Dib really should of thought better of her. Her personality really had…

Dear God…

Dib's sister stood, glaring at him, the small bag of heroine in her right hand and a strange kit, filled with a lighter, a spoon, and a rusted syringe, in the other. Dib managed to be both shocked and angry at the same time.

"Dib, why didn't you tell me?" Gaz silently called.

Dib was nervous again. "H-How did you find out? Y-You're not suppose to know!" He was shaking again.

"This is what you spent Dad's inherences on Dib? I can't believe you would do that."

Dib wasn't sure how to response to any of this. Gaz continued.

"I can't believe you would do something like this! What would Dad say about this, Dib?"

Dib could only think of one way to counter that.

"What would Dad think about your little round-abouts in collage? Huh, Gaz?"

Gaz was hurt by her brother's insensitivity, but tried to remain calm.

"This isn't about me Dib, this is about you. You have a major problem."

Dib was shaking and sweating.

"Come on, like you don't! Think of all the guys you've hurt Gaz! Think about!"

Gaz patience was wearing thin.

"Dib, this is completely different. This stuff could kill you…"

Dib was far to gone to even know what he was saying. He needed to shoot up and he would do what it took to get his sister out of his house.

"Oh, yeah, and it's not like you could die from an S.T.D…"

Gaz snapped.

"Shut up!" Gaz punched Dib in the cheek sending him falling back into the wall.

Dib's head was spinning and he had a burning pain in his cheek. She must've broken the jaw. All his emotions where pouring into each other and he might of felt tears coming down his face. He couldn't tell, everything was beginning to blur.

Gaz saw that her brother was crying and shivering violently. She hated to see him like this. Gaz bent down next to her brother and saw that his glasses where shatter as well. She looked down on him with pity. How did it come to this?

Things where quite different from Dib's point of view. He could barely see anything. All he knew was that he was hurt and he felt the need to defend himself.

The brother lunged at his sister.

Dib's hands clasps themselves around Gaz's neck while her hands clawed at his face. Gaz was taken completely aghast by her brother's actions. Was Dib that far gone? The two fell to the floor as Dib continued to pummel his sister. She tried to push him back, but Dib was fueled by some pure animal desire. Gaz built up her strength and pushed her brother off of her. Gaz stood up and ran towards the door Dib struggled to stand. Normally she would have just walked out, but she couldn't leave her brother this way. Dib managed to stand, but continued to stumble. He wobbled over to the lamp stand where he tried to balance himself. Gaz walked closer, wondering if it was safe to approach him. Dib fell sideways, causing the lamp stand and everything in it, the lamp, a phone and a gun, kept there in case of emergency,to fall forward.

That gun fired.

A bullet went sailing through Gaz's lung.

Dib's world began to fide into darkness. He saw his sister fall to the floor. He closed his eyes.

The last thing Gaz saw before dying was her brother's unconscious body. Her final thoughts where with him.

---

A year later…

Dib lay on his cot looking up at the cold cell ceiling. This morning was unusually quiet. None of the other inmates where shouting and carrying about as usual, and everything was eerily quiet. The silence was broken by the secretary guard's call.

"Membrane, visitor." Was all he said.

Dib sat up to see a familiar face.

"David?" Dib whispered.

"Long time no see, Dib." David responded. David removed a small bag from his pocket and handed it between the bars to Dib. Dib shook his head in response.

"I'm off that stuff." Dib whispered.

David smiled and chuckled to himself. "It's not heroine, it's a razor and cream. You don't look good with a beard, Dib."

Dib smiled and took the bag.

"I didn't think about that." Dib answered.

David looked serious.

"I'm sorry about your sister, Dib. Is that what you're in for?"

Dib shook his head. "My prints weren't on the gun even if they were on her. They couldn't convict me for murder."

"Then why are you here?" David asks.

"Processing an illegal substance with intent to sell was the verdict, I believe. Got me five years, but I'm hoping to get out early on good behavior…" Dib spoke, "But so is just about everyone else here. I think I wanted them to convict me. I think I wanted to beat the habit. It was tough, the first few months, but I'm better now, hopefully I'll be fully cured within a year."

David smiled. "That's wonderful news. The only thing I like more then escorting a customer to Hell is seeing them come out alive. I knew you were stronger then you looked."

Dib face was expressionless. "You don't care about me, you don't care about anyone."

David smiled again and quietly chuckled. "You're a better person then me, Dib, you are a better person then me…" David walked away.

Dib sank in-between the bars.

"No, I'm not," was the only thing written on his face.

---

End.


End file.
